Monday, December 22, 2003

Elvis, Mingus, and the Room of Old Toys

Trying to get upstairs in old NYU dorm...IDs are checked - I have mine miraculously. Young female security guard asks entering group for anyone's personal belongings so she can look through them while at her desk and not be bored.

Walking up flights of stairs with group, only to find at one particular landing that the next stairwell doesn't go up, it goes back down. We go back down to find another smaller stairwell going up across the room.

Up to a large space where the center of the huge space is a cavity that allows you to look down and see lower floors. No one wants to go near the edge and look down except for me. Two unidentified people and I check out a side room. There is a huge window; looking out we see a young Elvis Costello out on the balcony. Later I look through some smaller windows to find out that through these particular windows, it is dark out, while at the larger one it is daylight. The room itself is filled with every great old toy and some imagined ones all in pristine condition. Apparently this is the prized archive of a man who died, possibly Mingus. Two people with me are eager to leave room and move on to check out other rooms, but I "break tradition" and decide quite joyously to stay in this room for a while to study the treasures.

Monday, November 17, 2003

Chased by the Hulk

In apartment, Bill Bixby as David Banner from Incredible Hulk 70's TV show is there...he wants to prepare me for his Hulk transformation - eyes go white, he flirts with the transformation...I warn him he's going too far - but he does anyway and begins the full transformation - just like on the old TV show, but being there, it's actually quite scary. He (as full Hulk as played by Lou Ferrigno on old show) chases me out and around the block a few times. I try to get back and lock door, fail. At one point he is running by and I freeze behind a car like a statue and fool him, but he sees me shortly after and is about to overtake me on sidewalk (daytime) when dream ends.

Tuesday, November 04, 2003

The Post-Heist Battle

In my car with JD, with literally billions of cash dollars hidden in countless duplicate items in the backseat. Money is not mine, I'm en route to deposit it for someone or something. JD wants to stop at the store, wants to borrow $20 from the stash, seems ok if returned later. Convenience store is located in underground parking garage. Considering cash in backseat, I make sure all car doors are locked while leaving, but back left door refuses to lock. I check child safety lock to no avail (or logical purpose.) I'm looking around for someone, "Carlo" maybe, who is helping us, who should be around to help and watch the car while we leave. Eventually come upon him in another area of the parking garage, but he is behind a table and is pulling out two semi-automatics and firing in my direction. I duck down and dodge, realizing he's still on my side, he's firing at some enemies approaching from behind.

Becomes all out battle in parking garage/supermarket. Lots of gunfire, but I'm also throwing nearby items at pursuers. Female companion seems to repeat a previous action and verbal comment identically a few seconds after doing it the first time, which jars me into the vague sense that I am dreaming. As usual, my ability to control the dream takes over, I feel more free, and decide to end this senseless battle quickly by shooting two enemy females in the head, and march quickly towards the nearest exit so I can do what I like best when I wake up in a dream, which is fly.

I get to a high ceiling atrium-type entrance area, but am still pursued. I launch into the air, planning on crashing through the atrium glass, but I find instead it is made of some resilient plastic that cannot be smashed. I exit through the main doors instead and renew flight. Outside skyscraper now, decide to do something new: climb up the building's side, Spiderman style. Works nicely, soon extremely high up, but decide this is the best place to confront any fear of heights. There is another real Spiderman type on the side of the building and we engage in a spectacular mid-air battle that, as I comment to myself during, rivals any imagined in a comic book.

Later, playing on stage at an outdoor, daytime rock festival. I threaten to smash guitar many times but am only teasing audience it seems.

Tuesday, October 28, 2003

J-Lo's Ranch

Sort of a biographical movie about (and starring) Jennifer Lopez, who, we find out, before becoming well-known, was The Who bass player John Entwistle's girlfriend. She is really just using him for his money and celebrity of course. They are part of some illegal operation that runs out of a ranch-style home near the ocean. Eventually the authorities find out and invade the place. Lopez remarks to a female friend how now she will have to start from scratch again, and I'm impressed with her resilience. I am physically present, not just watching this movie, I see the FBI slowly raiding the ranch. There are two old mafia types in another living room just sitting calmly. I decide to flee out the back glass doors, hoping I'm not spotted through the windows. I am holding a glass of red wine as I walk briskly to a crowded boardwalk where many people are excitedly watching the (very rough) waters. I look and there are hundreds of dolphins (more resembling small black and white killer whales) leaping about in the rough surf. I take some pictures with a camera; a little boy points at me and says "Pulitzer," implying that just taking pictures of this strange aquatic event will garner me a photography award.

Tuesday, October 21, 2003

Bad Teeth

Only part remembered is some metal retainer type thing affixed to teeth extremely tightly. I'm on a boat of some kind/ferry cruise etc. I go into bathroom to remove metal, eager and anxious to feel teeth finally released...removal....too relaxed...teeth are in bad shape, left front tooth comes off in my hand, general decay...extremely bad feeling.

Sunday, October 12, 2003

Applebee's, Toys 'R Us, and George Duke's Limousine

Starts with JD in some Applebee's type restaurant. Leaving, nearly out the door, but realize we've forgotten some stuff in the booth (i.e. shopping bags.) This turns into an angry altercation with some managers. I lose it, shouting obscenities in front of patrons, and tell employees not to be so surprised I'm acting this way due to their obnoxiousness and condescension. At some point, able to return to booth and search underneath for bags; still missing stuff. Leaving again, I give more angry threats towards belligerent male manager.

Outside, meet up with JD and family; I'm embarrassed by previous actions. I move away down the block, decide to prank Applebee's on cell phone (calling 411 first.) I use sort of stroke-victim "Kissel" type voice and ask strange questions to employee who picks up phone, i.e. "do you have pickles?" etc. Cousin Tom shows up, we goof around. I realize I am also missing jacket, wallet, etc. We race back to restaurant; might be closing. Tom runs extra fast to be funny or make a point. Eventually with JD's mom and a relative played by actress Doris Roberts.

Get back, able to enter (not closed) but quickly realize this isn't the restaurant, it's the Toys 'R Us next store. Move next store and gain entrance into closed restaurant (employees cleaning up.) Opposite of previous exchange; friendly at first, I tell them I had left some things behind earlier and was treated badly by staff, but express love for establishment, which they appreciate.

Somehow this discussion changes location to the back of a limousine where I continue to negotiate with the staff, now on their way home. I notice one of the smug young girls actually wearing my jacket and take it back, only to be laughed at when I put it on and realize an inner lining has been removed. Somehow I get my stuff back including cash in wallet, through negotiation with young punk. Suddenly a figure appears from further ahead in the stretch car: it's musician George Duke, looking very friendly - I flip out, telling him how excited I am to meet him. He's also ecstatic as these young kids he seems to cart around in his limo to and from Applebee's don't seem to really know who he is. I start telling him which of his records I like and he finishes my thoughts: "I Love The Blues, She Heard My Cry", "Reach For It", and "Feel It." (All of these are real-life records by George Duke except the last one which is really called just "Feel.") I want to tell him I like a certain ballad called "Someday" (true) but am cut off.

We arrive at Duke's gated mansion; I realize I need to get back somehow to the restaurant (and my car there.) George agrees to take me back as he lets the kids out. The punk who eventually gave me my wallet back - we have a heart-to-heart, where we both reveal our serious financial difficulties. I decide to give him some money to show no hard feelings; I realize his sincere need. I drop a $20 bill but decide to give that to him. We get in the back of the luxury car together as George Duke takes the wheel.

Later, I'm back at Toys 'R Us. RU is there. Walking around, there is music playing, and I realize I am able to sing normally impossibly high notes, so I start improvising in a Middle Eastern style, joyful and laughing at myself, and especially one ridiculously high passage. I'm with some percussionists, moving through the aisles, while we pass another group of indigenous type percussionists playing their own groove. They slow theirs down a bit to match ours, but their downbeat is on our upbeat, which I humorously, visually note to one of the foreign players by moving to the beat in a certain way. He smiles and realizes the discrepancy, but it's all good. Shortly after, a brief discussion with RU on what to check out in the store.

Tuesday, September 16, 2003

Bee Aquarium and the Dire Wraith / Method Singing

Sorry for the long wait. I'll be better.

In my apartment, walking around living room...there is an large aquarium in the middle of the room. When in the bedroom, I realize I was wrong to remove the glass and mesh grating from the top, because - the aquarium was full of bees that have been escaping for the past five minutes. I attempt to reclose the aquarium. I am stung many times, but it doesn't hurt that badly; I'm kind of glad it happened because then I know there isn't much to be afraid of.

Later, at my parents' house, evidence of a break-in: impossbly large animal droppings accompany back door clues. Hmm. Burglar is not human, possibly a dire wraith from the comic book ROM I read twenty years ago. (Dire wraiths were scary red aliens that were slightly sluglike and had psychic/mystic powers. They penetrated the victim's brain with a long thin acidic tongue and sucked the life out of them, and were able to assume to victim's shape.)

A dire wraith is indeed seen creeping up the stairs inside, but somehow we all (family) end up downstairs. I opt to go up and battle it, bringing poker from fireplace as weapon. Wraith now resembles girl, she pleads innocence; I feel foolish and offensive brandishing weapon. However, she lies down on couch and begins to change: mutating, melting, turning greenish, then red, burning, smoking; it's a horrific display right out of the Exorcist. I lunge and stab creature with poker but it's futile; monster has become supernatural. I go downstairs to warn family - my voice is strangely deep and gruff. I tell them to flee - that the intruder is supernatural in origin, nothing we can do here. They flip out, incomprehensible panic. My father sees the ghostly intruder now moving through the ceiling and wall, out of my vision; my father says that's "illegal"; an odd way of saying it's against man's understanding of nature's laws.

Another short dream much later, in my apartment, talking to someone (possibly FS) about a song I'm supposed to be singing later. I'm getting in the shower and want to think about the part (I don't want to sing in the shower however.) I ask FS about the song, what's my motivation. I mention how I love Scorsese/DeNiro collaborations because you really get the sense that DeNiro's bugging Scorsese all the time about character and motivation, and it's the same thing with music. I can sing it straight, or I can do it "in character." Etc.

Saturday, August 09, 2003

A Demon's Holistic View of Time

Very dark and supernatural. Someone is driving a car through a cemetery, causing damage and also somehow interfering/injuring the dead. Bad karma; karma literally mathematically calculated somehow.

Demonic woman is explaining something to someone. The concept of Time is laid out as a large graphic; this is a picture of Time occuring all at once as seen from the outside (though to my eyes it still appears as a linear process on the graph.) Demon explains that from this vantage point, "answers aren't quite so clear" implying morality cannot be defined when looking at the totality of reality at once without the measure of Time. However, she makes clear that the right thing to do can be judged when each second is once again subdivided into past, present, future, and as she says this, Time starts up again as the demon more or less stabs her listener in the heart, implying this is the (awful and terrible) answer in the here and now, or something.

Also, a recurring dream, where I haven't been to school in a while. Late due to strange occurence. Mixed pile of compost and fireworks in driveway, has been set alight in hopes of calling for help. Someone shows up in a car and it's decided the firework display is not needed. I rather uncautiously go about removing the lit fuse before the pyrotechnics are ignited.

Tuesday, June 17, 2003

Pretzel and the Arab Boy

George W Bush has some type of 'pretzel'-type incident; lets press know he did not mean to scare the nation.

Questions about Iraq war justification lead to scene of Iraq bombing site. The US government has posters up of a now deceased Iraqi; using as a fear tactic to locals - "made an example of."

Arab boy rising from rubble, alive. I'm concerned to help him but I realize the danger, and he has submachine gun. I run with an identified person around a corner to avoid bullets, arrive in parking lot and dodge through parked cars. More bullets are fired, am able to elude injury, action dies down.

At some point there is a Koran, but the 'r' in Koran is replaced with an arrow symbol.

Monday, June 16, 2003

The Matrix Hotel / Ghost Jacket / Conscious Dreaming Into Space

This is a long one, but it pays off.

On some type of extended field trip, college-related, staying in some large hotel complex. Wood paneling. Hotel so expansive, it has its own movie theatre. I go to see new Matrix movie. Kyle MacLachan stars (dressed in black, shades.) Discussion about previous film's characters being robots/programs. I am in the scene, though not of it, able to move around in scene but still watching "movie." Bad guy/Agent Smith-type (very powerful) comes into scene, into elevator with other characters. He immediately shoots up through the roof of elevator in wait of rising lift. Then he magnetically drops down metal links to quickly build cages around Kyle and other protagonist in elevator. I am in the scene, but am still able to move more freely, being just a spectator. However, my capture is also attempted.

Second scene with bad guy firing guns at us; like in Matrix films, this happens in slow-motion and I'm able to dodge the bullets, but one grazes my knee and I feel pain - which is odd since I'm still under the impression I am just watching the film in the hotel theater. I decide to leave theater to evaluate situation and possibly return later.

Later, after encountering some characters from my past and from television (this dream overall is way too long to record here), I try to return to the Matrix film, since I had paid my ticket. But that entrance area is blocked by the filming of a new TV show, a Let's Make A Deal type game show, Bob Barker type host, in hotel lobby/conference area. Many celebrities are in attendance. Eventually the crowd becomes a packed wedding reception for a friend who is not identified. DM appears with high-school era mullet haircut. CM is there, resembling an elf at first, but engages me in conversation. He is a little angry about some things he heard that I had said ten years before, though I try to suggest that that evidence is dubious to begin with. But I try to explain my supposed previous comments to CM. I warn him that this "may sound pseudo-philosophical." But I go on that "THIS is now, everything before this moment is sinking away, like the Titanic; it HAD to be that way. There are always some (free-will) choices but things that have happened happen as part of the circle of life" etc. The analogy is taken further, that the past as such should not focused on, i.e. in music, old forms (pop music) should evolve, though they have not.

CM seems nearly convinced, but later confronts me with some comment I had made about livestock not feeling pain when slaughtered for human consumption, that that was also part of the circle of life etc. So I confess to CM that if I had ever said that, I was totally wrong; the animals do suffer, wrongly. Around this time there is some image, of a telephone, the buttons have anomalies after a certain point, i.e. 6 and 7 are on the same button.

There is at some other point a scene where I am seated at a large table talking with a man who is a priest figure (no uniform.) He has a small stack of communion wafers in his hands, and does a trick on the table where by placing his hand over them, he is able to make them levitate - but I see the black string that he is using to perform this simple hoax. He asks me to try and I try to catch the string with my pinky so I can also do this. He scolds me for trying too quickly without thinking my aim through. I then am able to do it, albeit imperfectly.

There is one more scene where I am moving through another hotel area, and there are some doctor's patient tables. Some tables are empty, others have patients and doctors at them. I make a joke to JM; one bed appears to have two orange dolphins lying in it, peering out from under a cover.

I go back into the wedding reception scene and a huge line is formed; one that appears to be (regrettably in this case) circular, with no beginning or end, it is indeed the line for the food buffet but it spans many rooms and hundreds of people. Eventually I find a way to fit into the line. It leads to a large vent in the wall with large slats that each person must climb through. I find it a bit difficult, my legs feel weak. There are helpers who adjust the slats to help each person through. Beyond it is a brief tunnel. I get through and there is a short old African-American man in a beat up sports jacket attempting to shine my shoes. Though he appears to be employed by the hotel, I still feel this is pretty degrading so I don't let him, and my shoes are suede or something anyway, so he only pretends to shine them.

THEN...he disappears and only his supernaturally-animated sports jacket remains, floating and flying through the air. I can't believe this, similar to superconsciousness/alien activity of a previous dream (sweatsuited - ghost dream.) I am nearly speechless but I ask JM if she is also seeing/believing this. Then I "take control." I am gaining awareness of dream, so I command the jacket to come to me. It flies into my arms with surprising speed and force. It is loose again, there appears to be a lightbulb at the heart of the open jacket, like a symbolic / cheap special effect "soul" or heart, which becomes incendiary and then the jacket flies around wildly. I command "THIS STOPS NOW!", aware that I am in control of the scene.

The scene changes to my parents' house, the den; house is empty except for an unidentified woman who watches me. I am completely awake and conscious of the dream. I examine my arm and hand, which seems to shift and change size with bubbling volatility. I immediately decide, as I do in every conscious dream perhaps, to go outside and fly. I run to the front door and open it, the sky is sort of painted fleshy pastel reminiscent of post-impressionism. This is a brief glimpse because when I do fly it is again with sudden force and I shoot up into space.

"Up there" I lose conscious control as I watch some sort of show on a stage. It appears to be a happy/staged reunion between Ronald Reagan and Mikhail Gorbachev in front of an audience. Gorbachev is not real, he is a 'something else,' wearing a large Disney-type costume that resembles Gorbachev. Large red eyes on costume. A spaceship tries three times to 'get up' or through some opening, only seen on third time when it has trouble manuevering and gets 'caught' on something.

The descent from space is fast and literally cartoonish - Daffy Duck meets Porky Pig type of cartoon descent. Cartoon angels with harps on clouds help me down; one makes a lewd comment to me to 'deflate' my situation. Nearing earth, me/cartoon considers smashing part of civilization vengefully on landing, but stop right before hitting and land softly in cartoon manner instead; psyche out.

"Awakening" in a hotel bed with cover up to face. I see a policeman at window about to knock with night stick; he must see me through window also, can't hide. Concerned and think of plan to bide some time.

Wednesday, June 11, 2003


Caught in a half-sleep state, and trying unsuccessfully to wake up. Think I've woken up, am walking around the apartment, but things are different, my hair is dyed and the color distribution changes moment to moment. Attempt to determine if this is dream or reality by focusing mind in certain way but - I'm fooled by dream, into concluding it is real. Attempt to float over floor by jumping and 'missing' i.e. not landing, with little success, tried that because have been able to float/fly consciously in many other dreams. Rest is forgotten at moment, but will attempt to write to this journal more often in hopes of regaining memory power.

Friday, May 09, 2003

Stairway to Heaven

Similar to the film "Jacob's Ladder", main character is me/Tim Robbins. Final death scene is played out but different than film. Boy comes to take me/TR up symbolic stairway, but boy wears train conductor's hat. At first landing where stairway turns to left, boy turns and faces, disappears. I continue, at top of stairs is a middle-aged conductor type taking tickets. Room beyond him is dark. I turn around, back on landing there is a TV showing (unknown) faces from memories. I see possibility of remaining on this threshold indefinitely, ghost-like, to keep in touch with people from past. I decide to see what lies ahead and think "God should be more than enough" and go forward.

On waking, in half-sleep state I attempt to go back to this dream and explore the room beyond train conductor. It is very dark with a window open on the far side to a deep blue night sky.

Monday, April 28, 2003

Alien Abduction

First part I remember is at my parents' house, my father is away. My mother is making some food, I'm very hungry. Too much bread.

Downstairs watching TV with mother, while food is cooking. Old Robin Williams standup special is on - he is dressed as "Mork" and makes a lot of early 80's references. Strange shot of an audience member making bizarre facial reactions to RW that seem contrived and surreal; intense. Cut back to RW - speaking nonsense, awkward halting movements and near-backwards jibberish talk. Audience seems to see humor in this. RW makes strange faces that soon become absurd and impossible - cartoonish distortions of face size and malleablity, a la Beetlejuice film or somesuch. Eventually RW's head more or less combusts (cheap sci-fi effect) on screen to reveal a strange robotic structure that resembles a small factory (form also still suggests facial features.) I consider mentioning out loud that clearly this is no longer a live performance, as we must be seeing some special effects and animation. Things get cosmic. Bizarro RW backdrop is outer space - then I'm shooting up into cosmos.

Only reference point for next sequence is 2001: A Space Odyssey. Galaxies are coming to life before eyes; stars, planets. Strange music plays to comfort me. There is some type of "Star Child" being born - but is more of a cross between a featherless newborn bird and human fetus - coming to life. Birth is in some sort of egg and numerous jet-black colored specimens of the same species are pushing in from the outside of egg membrane. This appears to be ok, natural; conception comes to mind.

Somehow this segues into an imaginary deleted scene (not from reality) from the Beatles film "Help." It is a scene that would take place at the start of the film but chronologically should take place after actual film's ending. The head of the cult is being prepared and put on the table to be sacrificed. I remark, now back on Earth, that this Beatles film must have been on the same tape or channel as the RW special - but am still somewhat shocked at the middle "cosmic" sequence that seamlessly linked the two.

Strange sequence follows, not much is remembered except what is described to someone else in the next sequence. But there are a lot of things going on in the dark and possibly I've been beaten to a pulp.

Now on the run, because "nowhere is safe." Decide to sleep in car near police station, safest place I can imagine. Long-haired cops take me however. I end up telling my story of the past two days to a female detective (first African-American, later Asian) in a private room at the station with a long table. She is a detective/psychologist, appropriately, because I feel the need to start off by telling her that I am not on drugs and am not crazy, but that something happened to me, people are following me and trying to kill me. I have little evidence and she doesn't seem to buy the conspiracy theory. She asks if I was raped, I basically say yes since I have no way else to describe the cosmic beating that happened to me in any realistic human terms. She asks why I didn't come forward sooner. I say the experience happened two days ago and I've been on the run hiding ever since, and now here I am.

THEN, she goes to a blackboard and writes/draws an explanation so esoteric and bizarre that at first I wonder if she is being sarcastic and mocking me, but it seems to be for real. Her not-exactly-stated explanation is that I've been abducted by aliens. She draws a picture of an alien face and surrounds it with words, i.e. what the aliens were taking from me ("wisdom", etc.) She draws an atmospheric map and even plots a rough trajectory and explains that this is the path the "visitors" use to come down to earth. I nearly remark on its similarity to the rainbow bridge from Asgard to Earth in Norse mythology, but she calls the "bridge" by a strange unknown name.

As she continues with the chalkboard, I look to my right and seated there is "someone" wearing a light grey sweatsuit with the hood up. However, there is no body in the top half of the body, but in the lap, hands tap a rhythm and there are clearly legs in the pants. I'm stunned and horrified at this apparent continuation of strange events, and scream for the female detective to turn around and look (hopefully this will prove my case, that something strange is going on.) But when she finally turns to look, the sweatsuit is placed like a person on the chair but there is definitely no one in it and there are no signs of life. I surrender to the possibility that I must be suffering from paranoid schizophrenia as nothing else can seem to explain all these strange happenings. She suggests medication but it frightens me even more, as I wonder how they can possibly cure me without possibly making these hallucinations worse.

Her immediate prescription is not, however, medication, but rather, a vinyl copy of Mahavishnu Orchestra's "Birds of Fire" record - i.e. this should help me...I examine the back cover and pathetically mention that I have already had this record for some time, in some vain attempt to show that I know something about anything and haven't been too far off track. The back cover shows the names of songs, some of which are true to life i.e. "One Word" and some of which are not i.e. "Candy." The detective is looking out the door at the clock and trying to get me out. I ask for a few more seconds of clarifications; she answers about how I should avoid listening to the last few tracks on the record as they are "bonus tracks" and were never meant to fit into the original "healing" scheme of the work.

Thursday, April 24, 2003

Brando's Raccoon

Watching a movie on TV; Woody Harrelson's character is being interviewed in a luxurious office with a long table by Marlon Brando. It is also kind of class oral report, WH is reading from something. Brando asks him to sing the rest of an answer. I look for the script to re-read this strange sequence, only to find it must have been improvised.

Now I am working for some large department store, Brando is theoretically the boss. Tom and friends have allowed some animals in; eventually it's a raccoon and a possum. The raccoon attacks me as I reach the top of an escalator, the possum also nears. I sympathize with the animals; they don't belong here. Sequence where I scold Tom and then decide to get the animals out. I go back to the escalator and find the raccoon; it is sitting in the last of these long line of potted plants near the escalator. A woman is standing dangerously close to it so I move her. I need a plan; I take a shopping cart and try to figure out how I can get the raccoon into it. Only then I notice that the top part of the cart is filled with a pile of dachshunds and small dogs - at this point I realize I definitely should be working in this pets area from now on, I have a knack for it. I move the cart to the other side of the area and wonder if someone was shopping for dogs with it.. Each potted plant seems to have some animal in it.

There is another sequence about large mechanical beetles than crawl down and fix clogged plumbing.

There is brief nightmarish sequence with Agent Dale Cooper and Sheriff Truman from Twin Peaks out in the woods.

Thursday, March 20, 2003

Kid A and Bubba's Return

I listen to the entire Kid A record from Radiohead, and it is precisely like the real record, until Morning Bell, which is a new version with different tempo and some heavy guitar on it.

Our old cat Bubba shows up later, killing small animals; many animals figure in this dream, but details are lost.

Tuesday, March 04, 2003

SUV Ghost / Oleo by George Harrison

Nighttime, outside a strange apartment building. In large SUV or Dodge Caravan type car (many rows of seats) with Tom. There is a ghost around the area allegedly; we are a bit nervous but are having fun faking ghost appearances and attacks. Finally ghost arrives, we exit car. We watch car from across the street, back door is open and slamming shut repeatedly by unseen person/ghost. We are amazed, can't believe we are witnessing this. Tom freaks out, goes over to strange crowd of young people near apartment building, grabs and kisses girl full on lips. He becomes an Asian girl explaining that she is from Canada. I enter building, meet up with JD, shared moment.

Later, playing guitar downstairs in parents' den with father and NS. Dad has the 12 string, I'm surprised it's in tune with other guitars. NS grabs other guitar as joke (can't play.) I read sheet music and we play (non-existent) George Harrison tune called 'Oleo.' Chorus is Cminor, Cdim, F walkdown, etc. There are some strange chords marked like Eb euphoria 7 or something similar misspelled (euli...)

Friday, February 07, 2003

Magic Candle / Evil Uncle Imposter / The Oral Sex / Deregulation of Reality

Apologies for any avid readers (the few, the insane) that I haven't updated recently. There have been many dreams but no time to write them except in shorthand in a journal. I'll put them up as time permits. But this dream occurred early Wednesday morning 2/5.

I "wake up" in my parents' house; it is mostly dark and empty of people. On the landing near the front door are set a multitude of candles burning, but very eerily there is one candle on a plate floating all around the area, as if by magic. Eventually I rationalize that there must be some great draft wind coming in under the front door to make this happen, but remain unconvinced. The kitchen clock reads one 'o clock, and it is pitch dark out, but I am not convinced it is not possibly 1pm and the sun has been eclipsed or something. Very supernatural feeling to this entire sequence and the ones that follow.

Looking for my parents, out of one dark room walks Uncle Jan - but he is not himself, possibly some demonic personage disguised as Uncle Jan. My parents' bed has not been slept in, I am very cautious and suspicious. More relatives gather in the living room, and I confront fake-Uncle Jan and fight him. Yes indeed, eventually I defeat him by slamming a chicken cutlet into his face. Real Uncle Jan appears from somewhere else and everyone is thankful.

Another place, unknown to me now but where I have just moved in the dream. I try to go upstairs, but the size of the stairway opening is a tiny crawlspace; I ponder how I, or anyone else, got the furniture upstairs. Upstairs there are large windows with ledges, so I assume the windows were removed and items lifted or craned in that way.

In one room with an unknown girl and some guys. The girl and I are at each other's throats, oil and water. There is a song playing I don't like, and I make the sarcastic remark that unless it gets turned off, someone has to perform a sexual act on me. Oddly, she agrees to the latter, and we go into another room and all the hate-tension has been transformed into intense passion and we get into a bed. A couple of the guys sit on the floor to watch, but hide their faces with coats, although later I noticed they have removed them. Some very graphic things go on that will not be described by me here on the internet; this is far too much information already. There is a problem with a condom, but she has another. Suddenly a few people walk in, including NM. I'm a bit embarrassed so I try to hide the prophylactics, but to no avail. NM takes one and toys with it.

The next section takes place at a large store, and patio restaurant. Basically me and a few other men are discussing the strange things that have been happening. Someone has printed out an email that talks about reality beginning to fall apart, entropy, etc. and how things will get stranger and stranger until the end of the world in October of 2003. Some major flaw in the design of the universe. Early effects are noticeable, for example at one point I find a pair of scissors (or similar tool) but instead of having two handles, it has three. Surreal things are happening. I am reminded and speak of my real life idea years ago to write a novel about God 'deregulating' reality, so that there were holes in the space-time continuum, i.e. you might walk into Burger King and find yourself in the Stone Age. I revise the idea in the dream, to the concept that God didn't get creation quite right, and now at the end of times, it is starting to unravel. I joke how "God shouldn't have rested that seventh day" which elicits much laughter from my company. I continue to brainstorm ideas about this book/screenplay, even though the reality of it is already happening or something. I picture a book about the end of the world, the break-down of reality into chaos, and I picture the book would end with the last few pages pure gibberish like mmmm jfruh njrvr okokef f wnfunf hrfuy helpsidh ndjf ijf o f8 nfaj % j etc. etc.

Then at a Jillian's type place, I see JD and I want to talk to her about what is happening with reality's fabric, I want to be with her, comfort her and help her through. I ask her to follow me so we can talk but we end up in this corner where the music speakers are too loud, so she runs off in another direction and I follow. There may be another younger girl following me at this point. At the other side of this complex JD goes through a door, but before I can reach it it gets obscured by other doors and curtains etc. in an oddly symbolic/poetic scene.

I continue to discuss the sudden reality problems and surreal happenings to some friends outside. Other signs of this growing chaos appear; a t-shirt whose image fades immediately when one looks at it, a misshapen jewelry box that someone has, that has odd crooked jewelry in it.

At some point I meet back up with my parents, eventually at their house, though my father may have figured earlier on, in one of the book idea discussions. Oddly but thankfully, JD is back with me and she is impressed to hear their tale; I ask them what happened to them, why they disappeared (see first part of dream.) My father says when the reality shift happened, they were in the dark and he had to guide my mother through, or maybe she guided him, but he was covering her eyes. To get back to where they needed to go, to survive (??) they borrowed money from NS and his father ($450 and $20K, respectively.)

There is one other sequence but I don't know where it fit in, but I am screaming at the top of my lungs at my father and leaving the house.

Friday, January 10, 2003

Swallowed Ring / Another Gig / Guitar Bodega

Hanging around with EA, eating something. Whatever it is, it seems to have a large metal ring (shower curtain size) at its core. I am apprehensive when I realized I have accidentally swallowed the ring, which is not meant to be eaten. This happens twice. I feel ok, but anxiety starts to set in; rings may be cutting off air supply.

Long sequence another night, much is forgotten. A gig taking place in a sort of school auditorium. Many performers; other known characters abound, I'm about to play, expectation and excitement is great. Technical problems. Paul tries to help. Opening with "Dink's Song." Cut short due to loss of power. Some people (David A.) helping with power supply cords. Growing impatient, myself and crowd. Crowd has taken stage at some point, but eventually clears out. I decide the performance is over. Twice verbally blasting someone, forget who and why, but I humbly apologize to him afterwards.

Cross between independent guitar store and city bodega; I sort of work there. Some younger people, kids, running around, family of owner possibly, taking stuff for free. This customer guy asks another employee (Chad but very distant from reality Chad) about Gibson guitars, and Not-Chad disparages them, which I take silent offense to. Recommends other manufacturer, customer picks out this small oddly shaped green guitar, likes it, plans to buy, has a gig soon, says he'll sit down while playing it due to weird shape, which I think is unnecessary. Compares nicely to Gibson, he says.

Another sequence with Doug, in his "office." Doug is in a little alcove playing the guitar. ES calls and I listen in on extension. She says some negative things about me and my work. Afterwards I protest to Doug. Doug mentions this idea that at some point he plans on starting his own record company, using the contacts and rejected offers from his current job. I strongly encourage it, pitch some ideas about web ordering and fulfillment. At some point people are comparing biceps. I say I'm not going in to work tomorrow due to earlier negative comments. Doug asks me "what this has to do with the city." Not sure what that means. Doug suggests sticking it out, I suggest some other routes I could take employment-wise.

At some point some unknown girl leaves and I decide to help her out. She is waiting outside now, the bodega/guitar store/apartment/office, to cross the street. I leave via a different entrance and approach the corner of the block. I use some unknown superhuman strength to twist the streetlight from the bottom until it shuts off. I cross the street and do the same to the DON'T WALK sign until it says WALK, or something. But by the time it takes, it may have already changed on its own. This was all done so the woman could cross street, but as I approach, station wagon (with her father? in it) turns corner and picks her up.