Sequence where I am walking at night; parents nearby with car. Someone starts walking with me, seems to think I'm someone else - someone he wants to kill. We are walking briskly as he threatens; seems deadly. At some point, somehow, he actually kicks me in the head while walking. There is no desire to fight him (or hope of winning.) Hope to draw him away from my parents. He fears being caught, eventually fleeing past an old policeman into a subway station. The old man pretty much lets him run by. I am very angry at this; cop makes belligerent excuses. I'm walking by and mutter vulgar insults about police department. My father arrives, oddly in full police uniform, but he is also upset. He chalks it up to the idea that "men join the force all eager to be policemen but then they stock up the higher ranks with liberals" i.e. this old man who let criminal go.
At an earlier point, massive fight with my father at parents' house - I am told to move out. It takes me a moment to remember I don't live there any more anyway, and I feel better after loudly reminding everyone of this.
There is another sequence where I am suddenly completely aware I'm dreaming. Everything feels very real - matter seems to have real substance. I'm on a dark top floor of an old city building. I open the window - the handle feels quite real strangely, and resembles school classroom window. It is dreary outside. I shout something (I forget what) out the window to announce my dream-awareness and I note it comes out slightly garbled - implying it is difficult to make conscious acts in the dream world. I am quickly thinking of what dreams I wish to have, since I am now in control, mind turns to certain people and dream ends.
No comments:
Post a Comment